weekly wisdom girlbossheaven be unapologetically yourself

Weekly wisdom #2: Be unapologetically yourself

Every week* I will do a post called ‘weekly wisdom’. Here I’ll talk to you about one topic that stuck with for the whole week. And with my latest obsession of podcasts growing even more, I thought I needed to write down the things I’ve learned so far. So I can always have a look at them from time to time. What better way to do that than to share it with you at the same time?

 

*Still struggling with the consistency part here. I need to work on that….


Why do we have such a hard time being ourselves? Ourselves as in our most amazing beautiful self. Your personality and your soul make you who you are. You being you is what makes you special. So now let me ask you again: Why do we still struggle to show our true self?

This is what this weeks wisdom is about: Hiding away who you really are, when being unaplogetically yourself should be your option of choice.

Do you remember the last time you were meeting your best friend?

Maybe you are smiling right now because are thinking about how you were having so much fun. You felt so amazing in your own skin… because you felt accepted. You felt like home. You felt loved. You were able to be your true self.

Now remember the last time you met someone new. How did you feel and how did you act because of that?

If your answer is: I felt awesome and acted like always and showed my true self … than this blogpost might not be what you are looking for.

weekly wisdom girlbossheaven be unapologetically yourself

When meeting someone new, we often tend to only showing “our” best features. Features that are often not part of whom we actually are. We hold back and stay quiet. We have this picture in our head of how we are supposed to act in order to be liked by this new person. We talk about things we are not interested in just because they like it. We simply hide our best features.

What are your best features? What do you absolutely adore about yourself?

Here are a few things I absolutely adore about myself:

  • My compassion: It doesn’t matter if I have ever been in a similar situation like my friends, I always know how they must be feeling. How I would be feeling if I were in their shoes. That is why the always come to me for advice.

 

  • My craziness: I guess everybody thinks of themselves as some kind of crazy. Get to know me and I’ll show you my kind of crazy.

 

  • My way of motivating myself and others: Countless times I have been told how good I am at motivating, whether it was my colleague at work who was avoiding an unpopular task, or my friend who was putting of working out for a long time.

 

  • My willpower: Well, if I have set my sight on a specific goal that I want to reach – even though it might take me years – I’ll definitely reach it. End of story.

 

  • My way of directly asking for what I want/Saying what I think: My friend once told me that she thinks it is absolutely amazing that I just go for it and ask the questions I desperately want an answer to. What I also like about myself – and it goes hand in hand with directly asking for answers – is my way of saying what I think. Besides a little sensitiveness, I always say what I think.

Now that you have read what I like about myself, don’t you think that I must be unapologetically myself when meeting new people?

Well….sometimes. Not often enough.

This has to change! Not being unapologetically yourself is not acceptable.

Look at all the benefits of being your true self at all times:

  • You always feel confident and good in your own skin because you are not wearing a heavy and uncomfortable mask

 

  • People love you for who you are because they only know your true self and not a polished, shiny and kind of fake version of you. This will save you from unnecessary disappointments.

 

  • #YourVibeAttractsYourTribe, there is a special magic surrounding you when you are unapologetically yourself. This magic attracts the people you need in your life. The ones who enrich your life on a daily basis.

 

  • You will find your path. And you will only find your path if you are in peace with yourself and show that.

 

  • You life will be so much more chilled because you will always have your own back. Because you like yourself. Because you are in a good relationship with yourself. Diane von Fürstenberg once said: The most important relationship you have in your life, is the one with yourself.

My loves, I want to open your eyes to all the positivity being yourself brings with it. I want you to start showing the world how awesome you are. The world needs more people who are unapologetically themselves. Don’t try to inspire everybody around you to do the same (I mean do it! That is awesome!… but) start with you.! The first step to change is within you.

Do not waste your life away trying to be sombody else just to fit in, be liked by certain people, get a certain job…. Life is too precious.

 

 

Weekly wisdom #1 spring new york city empire state building

Weekly wisdom #1: The truth about dreaming big

Every week I will do a post called ‚weekly wisdom‘. Here I’ll talk to you about one topic that stuck with for the whole week. And with my latest obsession of podcasts growing even more, I thought I needed to write down the things I’ve learned so far. So I can always have a look at them from time to time. What better way to do that than to share it with you at the same time?


Dreams. Dreams about starting your own business. Dreams about moving out. Dreams about studying something else. Dreams about becoming famous. It doesn’t matter. Dreaming big and actually doing everything possible to soon live those dreams is … so scary. This kind of scary that makes you want to go back to your comfort zone and pretend that you’re totally fine with your life the way it is right now. Because it isn’t that scary.

But, like… why? Why are those heartfelt dreams scaring the hell out of us? Making us settle for a less fulfilling, but more comfortable life? Btw. a less fulfilling life is not always more comfortable, don’t you think?  It is a mystery. I mean, dreaming big is working as a motivator to make them a reality so you can live a happy life. And still, it scares the hell out of us.

 

1. Just the fact that you want something, is a good-enough reason to do it + don’t wait for permission to do it

Out of my own experiences I can tell you that hearing other people’s opinions on your own dreams can work like a wrecking ball (did you just imagine Miley Cyrus, like I did? Hahah). We are all different and every one of us is unique. There is no other you … and that is your super power! Cliché but so true. Logically, our dreams and reasons to go after them are unique, too. That is the most amazing thing.

I made the mistake to expect others to understand my reasons. Most of the times they didn’t and that is okay. What is not okay is letting you stop that from pursuing them. If your heart is jumping faster when you think of your dreams... that is reason enough to go for it. I know, having the permission of someone – like your parents, your friends and your partner – is a great support and making the uncomfortable path to pursuing your dreams easier. Relationships might get twisted and change because those loved ones just don’t get why you’re doing something and that is okay. Because: the most important relationship you have in your life is the one with yourself.

 

You want something? Just do it. Trust your gut.

 

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2. Regret is an eternal question you are never going to get the answer to

One of my favourite quotes of all time says: Regret is what we should fear most. And this is so true. Rejections is an answer. Failure is an answer. But regret will be an eternal “what if” that is going to haunt you for the rest of your life. I am not kidding here.

A few years ago, I met someone and out of fear I was holding back all the feelings I had for this person. And two years later, I still think of this person and wonder what could have been if I wouldn’t have been so scared. All those ‘what ifs’ are daunting. This is an example of my private life but it can be applied to every situation in your life.

Don’t let that happen to you. Try to develop a mentality that includes the mantra ‘Better an ops, than a what if’ and live after it. If you apply this on a daily basis you’ll be surprised how life gets so much more enjoyable.

 

Don’t let your doubts and fear stop you, do it anyways.

 

3. You don’t have to live your life the way others excpect you to

Your parents, your friends and society. What do they all have in common? They have expectations on how they think your life should look like. Especially our friends and family only want the best for us and they have a certain perception of what “the best” looks like. You know, sometimes their version of “the best” isn’t what you want in life. And that is OKAY!

Still, even if we know that it is okay to live up to our own expectations we feel bad. Bad because we disappointed them. Bad because they only meant to do well and we didn’t take their advice. It is hard to shake that feeling of remorse off. It takes time and practice. And communication. Talk to your loved ones and tell them about your expectations and what you want in life. Show them how happy it makes you.

 

Live up to your own expactations. Because this is YOUR life. Live it like you want to.

 

pring new york city empire state building GirlBossHeaven